A farmer buys several sheep,
hoping to breed them for wool, chops, etc...
After several weeks, he notices
that none of the sheep are
getting pregnant and phones
a Vet for help.
The Vet tells the farmer that
he should try artificial
insemination. The farmer
doesn't have the slightest idea
what this means but, not wanting
to display his ignorance,
he only asks the vet how he
will know when the sheep are
pregnant. The Vet tells him
that they will stop standing
around and will, instead,
lay down in the grass and roll
around when they are pregnant.
The farmer hangs up and gives
it some thought. He comes
to the conclusion that artificial
insemination means that
he has to impregnate the sheep.
So, he loads the sheep into
his truck, drives them out
into the woods, has sex with them
all, brings them back and
goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and
looks out at the sheep. Seeing
that they are all still
standing around, he concludes that
the first try did not take
and loads them into the truck
again. He drives them out
to the woods, bangs each sheep
twice for good measure, brings
them back and goes to
bed. Next morning, he wakes
to find the sheep still
just standing around.
One more try, he tells himself,
and proceeds to load them
up and drive them out to the
woods. He spends all day
shagging the sheep and, upon
returning home, falls
listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot
even raise himself from
the bed to look at the sheep.
He asks his wife to look
out and tell him if the sheep
are laying in the grass.
"No", she says, "they're all
in the truck and one of them
is honking the horn."